Thursday, May 13, 2010

Terrible Thursday

Today has not been a good day thus far. My Birthday! Levi got up at 430 am sneaking around the kitchen trying to get in to whatever he can. I picked him up put him back in bed screaming and crying told him back to sleep and closed the door. I myself just laid on the couch and soon enough i heard B***H this and B***H that form jonathon's mouth. All morning it has been nothing but cussing screaming fighting from both of them. I finally just sat there crying and sobbing because i just cant handle when they do this kind of stuff. Jonathon wasnt actually suppose to go to school but the dr said i could use my discreation and well after 2 hours of that non sense this morning they both finally got dressed and i took them both to school. Took them in Jonathon had pockets full of cars and i got them thrown at my head but got them and he refused to eat breakfast so fine took him to his classroom and i sat with Levi while he ate breakfast and got him to his classroom. Now i think i can breath for a few seconds.
PS Not to mention Jerry is here and i had woke him up 3-4 times to please come help me get the kids ready and he got up peed went back to bed where he still is snoring away.
What a way to start My Birthday Off.... Mothers day wasnt much better. But why oh why would i or should i expect much more than that. Besides my facebook friends no one says happy birthday does anything nice or even calls. My grandma sent me an e-card which made my morning.
I just realized im 33 and have accomplished nothing in life. My kids act out so much and act as if they hate me and each other i dont even know which way is up anymore half the time. My husband is ungreatfull and acts juts as bad. Hes been gone 10 months and yes i let him come here for the summer and its been 6 days and i CANT STAND him i have come to realize and he wont help with kids, cook, clean, OK he did pick up the living room yesterday while i was at the hospital with Jonathon but still. He has no respect and all he has done since he has been here is sleep eat and yell and scream. UGH UGH UGH what will i do. I wantso bad to just get up and go move far far away but then i thik the way my kids act i wouldnt want to be seen by any of my friends and have them see how terribly i have raised my children and how not in control i am.
I have so much homework to catch up on to be able to pass my classes and not get thrown out of school im frustrated. Not to mention i run out of unemployment next week and no job wow what a shocker.. I have done everything possible to get a job had 2 job offers but oh wait we cnat hire you until you get your felony set aside form the state which i have done time and time again so i wait two months get the paperwork she says fax it to me i did 3 weeks ago have emailed 5 times called twice and wont return either and is always busy guess that job not gonna happen.... WOW this first post turned out to be very long. and Life Goes ON!!!!!!!

1 comment:

  1. poor thing you. happy birthday, late sorry, just found out.
    seems like that so called man of yours needs to move along, and be out of your life for good.
    been there, will never do that again. love is not that grand to go through that. if your going to be a single mom, then just be a single mom without an attachment hanging on by a thread killing you slowly. get those children back in line, you can do it. show them you are NOT weak. i hope you pass your class, that will be an extreme booster, let me tell you. once that is conquered, then capture, and pull those child rearing reigns, and conquor them children. be strong!